Time is marching on.....

My condition hasn't changed that much but this week has had some pleasant moments including a visit from a dear old friend who was visiting her Dad

who lives next door. I can't begin to tell you what a pleasant time I had talking with her and hearing more about her life. I've known her since she was about 4 years old but haven't lived close to her since she got married and moved away. Gail came and cleaned the house today and it feels so good. We have an appointment with my new Oncologist tomorrow morning and I'm so hoping it goes better than last week's appointment.

We also had our first snow of the year and it lasted less than 24 hours from start to finish. It was so warm today that BigD had the back door open for a bit to air out the house.

Miya found herself a warm and cozy place to rest. She has been so loving lately. I wake up with her sound asleep in my lap. I love the feel of a cat sleeping on or touching me.

I was also happy to get a picture/text message from Rie of her two boy out in service. I'm so happy she is staying in touch with us. I miss her so much but am happy she seems to be adjusting quickly to her new home. Keith has already been down to see them and hopefully he has some pictures to share when he comes over the next time.

This last picture is of the elementary school I attended the second half of my 1st grade and the first half of the 2nd grade. I was a terrified little girl walking those long blocks to a strange "city" school. When I think about Page2 going to middle school next year it makes me sad and a little anxious. I need to post an update email to everyone. I've had so many people call me to let me know they miss them and are hesitant to "bother" me with questions.

When time flies.......

For the first time since August, I can say time has flown by this week.  My dear friend Ruth arrived last Friday evening to stay with me and BigD for a week!  I can't believe she will be leaving tomorrow - the week has flown by. I know she must be bored to death by now and has watched more TV this week than she does in a month. I keep trying to talk her into extending her stay a few more days but she has to get back to her family. I can also say that I had two pretty good days this past weekend when she first got here. I still haven't turned the corner but those two days have helped me feel more positive that I will eventually get better. Monday was a very hard day at Duke - they had triple booked the appointments and we were there for over 5 hours. Throwing up into a garbage bag in a crowded lobby isn't any fun at all. BigD is cooking fish tonight with his homemade tartar sauce, fries and slaw. GG is going to eat with him and Ruth and the kitchen is starting to smell pretty good. Too bad I'm still on Ensure but I'm not complaining about it - it has been a life saver - literally. We have laughed, talked, watched movies on TV, talked about our favorite books and everything else under the sun. She has also relieved BigD in helping with my meds and schedule. I'm going to be sad to see her go but am so happy she was able to be here as long as she has.

Update.......

 Page has been here all week working from home and yesterday in her company's Raleigh facility.  One of her VP's (she used to work for him in Atlanta before he was promoted to bigger and better things) was on-site in Raleigh while she was there and asked her to come back this morning because there were things he wanted to discuss with her. Turns out he had spoken with her boss in Atlanta who told him about me and BigD and he wanted to see how she was holding up. He told her she can come up here and work out of that office when she feels  she needs to be here. I was thrilled to hear that. She is going with us to my appointment at Duke tomorrow morning and then back to Atlanta. Not sure when she will be back but might not be until my treatments start. They are trying to get me well enough to have the treatments and even though I have improved some.  I am no where close to being well enough.  The thrush in my mouth is still there and since I'm now on an antibiotic for a bladder infection, not sure when it will go away.  Have 4 more days worth of medicine for it so am hoping the meds will kick in soon.  I'm trying to be a grown-up and not whine too much about how much I want her here. She will never know how much it means to me and BigD that she takes so much time with us. We do appreciate it.  I also appreciate every one's cards, visits, emails and especially prayers and encouragement. It all means so much to me. BigD is feeling pretty good - working part-time again. I thought today might be a turn-around kind of day for me when I first woke up and actually had a moment when I felt a little excitement but it went downhill shortly before lunch time.  Eileen brought fresh roses this week - they are gorgeous - yellow this time. She is so sweet and generous. She also brought us a case of Ensure and large supply of Kleenex from Costco. I go through almost two boxes of Kleenex a day.  Page2 went to an open house at the middle school she will be attending next year. I know - I hate it.  When did she get old enough for middle school?  I know I've been slack lately but I haven't been on the computer too much.  Will do better when I start feeling better - promise. Feel bad that Page has to drive so long tomorrow since she is now on antibiotics for a respiratory infection.  She has had a really bad cough for several days (so has BigD but he said he has had enough of doctors to last him awhile).  Our doctor couldn't work her in this morning so she went to the Urgent Care that Roseanne and Sher work at. Hopefully they will kick in a little and she will be much better for the trip tomorrow. 

Busy morning.....

Page got in last night safe and sound. We got up early this morning for my appointment at Duke. We weren't surprised when it was decided I'm still not healed enough to start my treatments. I'll be honest and tell you I was so relieved since this past week wasn't one of my best ones.  I made the mistake of trying to extend the time between when I take my pain meds.  HUGE mistake - took three days to get back on top of it.  I also found out I have thrush on my tongue (got new prescription for that) and I had to be hooked up to an IV because my blood work showed me being very dehydrated.  I need to work more food into my daily intake and have an appointment for next Wednesday to probably receive fluids again. They will see me weekly until I start the treatments.  She also wants me to work with a physical therapist and I'm guessing I'll find out more about that next week.  We were there so long I was over an hour late getting my pain meds and now I'm having to work on getting on top of that again.  Next week I will take food and meds with me so that doesn't happen again.  The pain in my ears when I drink, eat and take meds is coming from the area where my saliva glands are.  They aren't working yet which is why I have to take a sip of water with every sip of Ensure.  Tired.....

Good Day...

I think I can honestly say today was a good day.  Not just because Roseanne came which always makes for a good day but because I could actually feel a difference - a little better.  While we were studying for the meeting I had a surprise visit from one of Page's old friends and her beautiful son.

I haven't seen them in a long while so we spent some time getting caught up. She brought a nice plant, lovely gift and another gift for Page when she comes. When she told me the other bag was for Page, she mentioned that she had gotten to go home to Ecuador for a visit so I'm thinking she brought her something from there. Her son has gotten so big and is still gorgeous beyond belief. BigD went for his treadmill test today and it looks like he is going to have to have a procedure. He doesn't want to talk about it so suffice to say, Page is going to be a very busy woman in 2 weeks when I start my new treatments and he has his procedure in that time period. Page flies to Europe to work for a week this weekend and will then drive up that next weekend and work from here and their Raleigh branch to help us. I know - we don't know what we would do without her.   We hope she realizes how much we appreciate it.  Here's hoping tomorrow is a Good Day also - and the next, and the next, and the next....

Touch base...

Decided it was time for a brief post to touch base. Not been on the computer too much lately - went on to check emails a friend told me she sent but didn't find anything. Had a nice visit with Roseanne yesterday. Got my hair cut today and it really needed it. Keith got back in town Thursday and came by to check on me today and share a few pictures of his cruise. Looked like everyone had a great time.

Gail snatched this picture of Princess Miya doing what she does best and as you can see, the tulips are still holding on to their color. Most of the petals have fallen so they will more than likely be gone by tomorrow. Have totally enjoyed them. Rie came by with the car group and CO's wife yesterday with a fresh bouquet for the kitchen table. I'm going to miss her and her little family so much but know this is going to be a very good move for them. Talked with all my babies except Page2 today so that was nice because they all sounded good. TIME -

Email sent out tonight.....

Decided to put my email here so as to catch everyone up on where things are as of today.
Had follow-up with radiation/oncologist today. 3 weeks tomorrow since last treatment and was so hoping to be much better but alas, it isn't to be. He went into detail as to why - extreme aggressive nature of the cancer requiring aggressive treatment and surgery which was planned out by the surgeon and radiation oncologist together to give me the best chance of success. Examination of mouth and throat show they are still very raw, extreme mucous (there is a formal name for the condition) combine to cause almost constant nausea.
He really hopes I will see significant change in the next two weeks but asked me to change my perception of a very important 4 letter word = T i m e. He wants me to stop thinking in terms of days and think in terms of a week at a time. He wants me to stop and think next Wednesday how I feel today as compared to then. He said I have to let TIME do it's work - and because of how extensive everything has been so far, it will take TIME.
He did say that if I don't see a lot more improvement, he will suggest my follow-up treatment be moved back a few weeks.
Overall - it was a good visit - he saw nothing in the examination to cause alarm in any way and told me I will be seeing the surgeon in a few months and then him - going back and forth between the two of them from now on. I told him about my upcoming surgery in March to have the cancer on my nose removed and we just looked at each other and I said - "I know, just shoot me". He laughed and said that was exactly what he would be thinking if it was him. From the things he suggested, it was obvious I have to stay on top of my day to day attitude.
Eileen came by this afternoon with some pretty yellow roses. It was so nice to see her and have her stay for a visit. She told me she thinks I need to start sending little update emails again - even if just a line or two. She said the reason she came by today was she figured things weren't going well because I had pretty much stopped communicating. That I need to put just a sentence or two up every so often - that people start worrying if they don't hear from me. A little later, I had one of Gails's wonderful support phone calls with some good ideas to keep my spirit up. SO - I hooked up the computer and lo and behold - there were about 5 different emails addressing the situation of not hearing from me ---- SO - I will try to do better. Plan to put this in my blog for those who follow me there.
I do so appreciate everyone's thoughts, prayers and encouragement and count on them every day. Don't give up on me yet.

Much love to all of you.....