Found this leaf on the windshield of my car on Sunday - hopefully it means cooler weather isn't that far off. Went to the graveside service this morning for Eileen's Mom, Ginny. After I grabbed a bite to eat, I started driving out toward the country to wind down and decided what I really needed was a little "scoota-pootin" as Mama would call it. The AC in the car was blasting, some soul music was playing and I was totally enjoying the freedom of not having any idea where I was. Maybe I just needed to be alone enough to cry some. It was nice to see so many lovely older homes and landscapes before I pulled out my GPS and headed back toward home. Ruth came over to let us know about her brother - not good news. It turns out his cancer is in more places than we thought. They did some tests and should know something next month. Ruth asked me to ride back home with her for two weeks or so. As tempting as it is, I can't run away. As hard as it may seem, I just have to work harder to be even more resilient....re·sil·ient/riˈzilyənt/Adjective1.(of a substance or object) Able to recoil or spring back into shape after bending, stretching, or being compressed.
2. (of a person or animal) Able to withstand or recover quickly from difficult conditions. To be honest, I'm not feeling too resilient - feeling a little "brittle". I'm not sleeping well at all and should be in bed but laying there just makes me feel sadder so maybe if I write something down, it will ease my mind. I spoke with Page earlier and they were getting everything ready for Bentley's surgery....I started to say in the morning but it already is morning isn't it?
I've missed you :) I read the sign in the picture before reading your blog and I thought the same thing -I can't have a sign like that because it would be a lie. Ah well. My best memories with my family growing up, are of us -just driving- to towns past our house, places we've never seen before, country that was so unfamiliar. It's good to cry, it's a healer. Is your stomach feeling any better?
ReplyDeleteSorry!! Miss you, looking forward to Friday. Hope the cry helped. I've been feeling weepy for the last couple of weeks not sure why. Love you
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