Anyone who reads my blog already knows I have a tendency to ramble on and on and on - SO - let's see how good I can be at concise and to the point. Long story short - the good news I received from my doctor and the biopsy took a really big U-turn. Turns out the place in my throat is Melanoma! I know - one of the scariest words in the world - right up there with Cancer! They were looking for the cancer I do have and the Pathologist sent her the "good news" before the final two studies came in. I really want to be the following person:
"I will not die an unlived life. I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire. I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me, to make me less afraid, more accessible, to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise. I choose to risk my significance; to live so that which comes to me as seed goes to the next as blossom and that which comes to me as blossom, goes on as fruit. - Dawna Markova"
And most of the time, I think I achieve most of this .... however .... I'll have to admit when I heard that word in connection with my throat - I felt like a bull had kicked me in the stomach. I have a friend (and a sister) who don't want to share things with people - keep everything really close to the vest so to speak. My sister became so obsessive about it over the years I was determined I would not be that way. Besides - how can your friends and loved ones be there for you if they don't know there is a need? I've probably gone in the opposite direction to an extreme at times but for the most part - my life is an open book - ergo - a blog for goodness sake. SO - I've let everyone know what is going on, when my upcoming appointments are and will continue to let them know what is coming down the pike because I need their good, positive vibes coming my way and their prayers for me being sent to the heavens.